Managing our expectations with help from yoga.

I hope wherever you are reading from, that you are enjoying the first signs of Spring. 

This week, the word expectation kept popping into my head. 

It couldn’t possibly be that my expectation was to celebrate the spring equinox, but instead I was snowed in by a blizzard not seen since the late 1800’s.

When you grow up in a house with a dad who is an engineer by trade, the expectation is that everything is pretty much in working order. 

Growing up this way was difficult when you expect everyone around you to be just like your type A dad. I always had high expectations of everything and everyone around me. But boy, was it hard when it felt like my expectations weren’t met. 

I learned after having three children that my expectations were set way too high. For the benefit of my frustration and everyone else around me, I had to learn to manage my expectations of others and of myself. 

With others, I learned that I had to be more patient with how they work in the world. With myself, I had to try to understand why it bothered me so much when my expectations weren’t met. 

I do believe the practice of yoga has really helped me work on my expectations of others and myself. I think this work sneaks up on you. I came to practice yoga to heal my back, but I gained so much more by learning its deeper aspects. 

The eight limbs of yoga have been especially helpful as I learned to manage my expectations. Two of these limbs helped the most.  The first limb is called “The Yamas,” and a part of this limb, Aparigraha (non-attachment), was so important to me because it helped me let go of the need to control how I believed things should go. 

The second limb is “The Niyamas,” which include Santosha (contentment), Svadhyaya (self-study), and Ishvara Pranidhana (surrender), which were vital in helping me look inside, surrender the control I don’t have over others, and be content with how things play out. 

Managing my expectations has been life-changing for me. If you struggle to manage your expectations, take some time for self-study to help you understand why.